Internet dating can be a very fun and interesting way to meet new people. It definitely allows for more dialogue and insight into who the person really is and what they're looking for when compared to the alcohol-fueled bar scene. Online dating allows people to meet, communicate and perhaps form very significant and meaningful relationships with one another. However, considerable care and caution needs to be taken when bringing an online relationship to the real world. There is potential for people to pretend that they are someone else online, regardless of how exquisitely worded their profile may be or how great you seemingly get along in e-mail or instant message communication. Now this does not mean that you have to exhibit constant paranoia. Most of the people you communicate with will be sincere and legitimate. There may be a little white lie here and there, but nothing Earth shattering. Just be aware that there are also some very dangerous types online. Individuals that use the Internet as a virtual playground with personas that are totally misrepresentative of who they actually are. They purposely deceive and may even have the intention to harm those that befriend them. This is why meeting offline requires you to be smart, safe and use common sense. One question to ask yourself is how well you know the person you are chatting with? Some online dating sites archive your email communication and there should be an option for saving instant message transcripts. Before you commit to meeting someone offline look through your archived communication to ensure that stories about who they are, what they do for a living, where they've lived previously and what they are looking for are consistent throughout your communication. Were there any questions that they chose to ignore or were vague in answering? Were they only available at certain times during the day and night? Were they insistent on you not messaging them outside of a particular time window? The latter could indicate that they may be hiding a relationship and going behind the back of their significant other. Before you physically take your internet dating courtship to the real world, how about taking it to the telephone? Hearing a person's voice adds a completely new dimension to your online communication. You can tell a lot from someone's voice. You may hear their sincerity or notice a change in their tone when you suspect they might be lying. They are less likely to be hiding a relationship if they are on the phone with you. You may also learn certain things about them from peculiar background noise. A crying baby perhaps? It is suggested that you use your cell phone rather than home telephone as a precautionary measure. Your home address may be traced through your home phone so it's best to just be careful. Again, it may all be unfounded and unnecessary concern, you just need to remind yourself that you don't completely know who you are conversing with. Here are some tips for when you are finally ready to move on from online dating to real-life dating. It's highly advisable to not put yourself in situations where the two of you are alone. Some recommendations include taking separate vehicles and meeting in a public location with plenty of people and foot traffic. Maybe suggest a double date with another friend? Be sure to bring a cell phone and remind someone, whether it's a friend or family member, to call you a couple of times throughout the evening. You can also devise a code word that lets the friend know that you are truly ok or that you need some help. At least follow these guidelines through the first few initial dates until trust is gained. Nobody is trying to scare you away from meeting people through online dating sites. Just go into everything with a good head on your shoulders and be smart, you should be just fine! |
